lalalala

thanks mimi for the comment..don't worry...no matter what happen..i'll still survive..and most of the time..i'm cheerful..i hope..hehe...hiya..cockroach doesn't die easily right?
wah...lizzy...does that mean i'm unique?? hehe...never thought gossiping can be link with angelic..does that mean you're pressurised?? or i'm just too angelic?? :P bleh

finally..my dear is back today...he must be tired...i'm tired too...feel like..so many things to do..but i'll finish it eventually...because i have to...haha

my niece come liau..it's a tiring job to babysit her for one whole day...from yestereday experience..i think..unless i'm bored to death..or else i won't want to have baby...
eversince few years ago..i never believe when people say babies are angel...for me..some can be real nightmares..one of the best examples is my niece...but..people always fall in love easily with devil i guess...i'll miss her if she doesn't come here for more than one day

i look forward to saturday too...and because we haven't made sure that it's buffet on that night..i keep thinking about other substitution..in case things don't work the way we want...meimei will be going to school with me on wednesday...whether should i ask her along...but honestly..if i do ask..i'm just trying to be polite...hehe..

beautiful things are most of the time dangerous and disastrous...that's what on my mind when i was on my way back...for some reasons i don't know..

my first post at 20 yrs old :p

it's been a while since my last post...what to do..whenever i think of posting something up..all i can think of is the unhappy stuffs...so i just forget about it lah...

but not all are bad things lah..like on my birthday, i realised that a lot of people remember my birthday...which made me shed tears..and i got my digital cam...which i know i'm too careful when using it..so far..i never bring it out with me...i'm soo scared to cause any damage to it..
my aunt jennie bought me a birthday cake for surprise..and my uncle hua bought KFC meals here...another aunt bought pirated champaign here also..
but..i was disappointed at the end of that day...because nothing at all from someone i adress as father...he was back 2 weeks before my birthday..but gone again on my birthday...wonder are we still in his heart...
and i learnt that...i hate him..i despise him..everything i feel towards him...is just indirectly pointing out that...i still want this father...still haven't completely given up hope in him...how sad..

exam is coming in another 4 weeks time...a bit stress...because this time i'm going to have geo exam...that's a headache...i don't know how am i going to get through it...it's not something which i can bluff or make up my own theory...too unfamiliar with it...but i know i still have to study for it...i'll just be ready for gaining weight lor..:p

my dear is supposed to be back today from sibu..but because of the rain..he'll only be back tomorrow...miss him...but...still ok ok lah...i guess because it's not the first time he went back to sibu liau kua...so..not so lovesick like last time..

i like rain..but not at night time..sleeping in a stormy or rainy night makes me insecure...as if i can end up in complete darkness at any time...

i have that difficulty to speak up in class lah...i hate myself for being so chicken...but it's so hard to break through...haih...i guess it's the 'perfectionist' in me kua..so afraid to make mistakes in front of people i'm not familiar with...must find a way to overcome it...

finally~

yea~ finally no more work for this week...
but i can't stop myself from worrying about those works i'm yet to do...haih...like i said in my presentation..uni life is definitely not relaxing and free..

the lectuerer said my presentation is good...except that the examples i gave were not geographical enough..overall ok lah...my first time speaking in front of a group for this semester..
hm...nothing much about the study lah...

last night my aunts them came and celebrate birthday for me...ok ok lah..i ate too much during day time so can't eat much by night time...my brother-in-law gave me a keyboard...which i'm using now...then my aunts and my cousin gave me a set of necklace and earings...then oh..my mom is going to buy me a digital camera...well..don't know should i be happy about it or not..
i mean..i do wish to get a digital camera...but..what i planned is i buy it with my own money...
not the first time though...electric keyboard, mobile phone and now digital cam...i'm really grateful and happy...just..a bit disappoint because i didn't have the chance to buy it myself..

last night, when everyone's here..bee called me oh...she needed a car to go out to get her things..but her sis refused to lend her the car...i knew that she's implying if i can go out to fetch her..but..i was stucked with a lot of hesitation..so in the end i turned her down...i really think since i'm not going out..it's weird that i just go out to getch her..then go get her things..send her home and come home...our houses are not near leh...but i'm feeling guilty for not helping her lah...haih...
maybe i shouldn't just turn her down..maybe i should've asked if the things are urgent...maybe should've asked can she wait till this morning...
because..if the roles exchange...she'll probably help...although i'll never make that kind of request lah...maybe i should apolosize to her again...yeah..i'm going to do that now...

last and most productive day of the break

today is the last day of the semester break...
i'm going to miss the time during the break...and i didn't complete anything...i'm going to be soo busy next week...so i guess..no update until end of next week...or maybe after my birthday lor..
i think i'm more ready now to face my human geo lecturer...it's been a week after all...plus..if i'm sure i didn't do anything wrong..what for i scare...so...won't be a problem lah..

nothing much to mention actually...just feel like updating...

think think think

i've been thinking recently..do i really like uni life??
erm...sometimes i'll have that impulsion to quit uni lah...at times..i'll be lost...wonder what will i become in the future...wonder where will this programme i'm taking lead me to...and then..once again..i'll realise i don't want to be someone too professional...last night..i was thinking..one good thing when i was in biomed is...i never have to worry what will i be..because being in that course means i'll work hard to be a doctor..but now..this biological science provides a lot more options...which is a big problem for me...last night..when i toss and turn on my bed..i've made up my mind...i think i'll probably be a school teacher or a lab technician...since i look forward to work in school...and yesterday when i helped my cousin with the revision..i actually enjoyed the teaching..and..i always have that desire to tell people the scientific theory behind everything..
it's a great relief to know what's my next step...
well..sometimes i really wish to stop studying in uni..and start going around to learn different ways of cooking and make nice drinks...i really wish to have a small cafe or restaurant lah..then i can serve people with healthy food...trying to get an uni degree is just one of my ways to earn money so i can open a shop....or maybe a florist..but then...i don't like to see a flower wilt...

holiday is a bad time for study...so i didn't do much...although i planned quite a lot...but ok lah..at least i got to rest...rest is important if you want to succeed :P

willie asked for my blog address...but i asked him to find it out himself..since he said that he has big satellite..
for me...it's ok if anyone read my blog...but...not asking the address from me...i'll feel awkward in front of that person lor...but i also know that there's good side if this blog is open to public..hehe..don't knwo lah..

merimbun...

went to tasek merimbun yesterday morning...at first felt a bit reluctant to go lor..because it's semester break eh...and going to a place with lecturer around..although it's not lecture...still would feel like studying..
it was my first time there...at first felt a bit bored...listening to the talk...but i like the view of the lake from the exhibition hall...from far the water doesn't look blackish at all...then tracking...erm..ok ok lah...at least it helped to burn more calories...and i hope i remember some of the names of those trees...but when i was in the forest..i didn't feel safe oh...because on the entry of that interpretation trail..there are footprints of bears and some other animals...so i was quiet and aware...hehe...
then before we came back...we went to the lake...finally...
it's soooooooo amazing there...although there isn't any exciting scenery..i still fell in love with it..because it's so calming, peaceful...and natural...i just can't find a right word to describe how i felt...but i definitely would like to go there once again...despite the long drive...the water is black in colour..due to littering of some kind of leaves...then when i stood there at the hut in middle of the water..i felt soo...ohh god...the wind, the sunlight, the flow of the water, the ripples...everything's so perfect....even the grass 'purun' look soo tempting...some of us tried fishing there...saw 3 friendly old ladies there (not you 2 ah)...they're fishing there so some of us helped lah...hehe...but too bad we didn't manage to get a boat ride..because the water is low at this time of the year...just that short half an hour time we spent at the lake site made me forget all the boring and tiring stuffs we did before that..hehe...like tek ying said..i'm the type of people who love natures..hehe...
erm...we didnt manage to see any crocodiles there also..eh mimi..where are your family members there kan?? :P

and i realise that...actually the authority in this country really care about our nature...they're very anxious regarding conservation...but too bad..the general population isn't cooperating with them...so next time i won't accuse the government for not doing something...i'll point the arrow to the public....including myself i think...

today is the 3rd day of the break..and i think i better start doing my work...i've read about the themes in geo...but...just haven't written them down in words...and i have some difficulties in looking for appropriate examples in Brunei...those examples i can think of..well..too offensive...so need to look for others...

aiya yu herng..i didn't say anything too private leh..the one i mentioned with my dear..not private at all ah...my friends all know that we're together...and i just mentioned something...erm...brief...
hehe..don't worry lah..i know where's the limit lah...hehe..thanks anyway...