Yoga made my day

Today marked my first complete shoulderstand. Yea!!!!


My first attempt failed, due to the strain on my neck. Then the second attempt went well. I have never doubted the importance of having a good yoga instructor. My instructor helped me through the pose and even identified my problem regarding the pose. She's the best instructor one can ever find. Just in case you're wondering, shoulderstand is like this:

And, my next goal is to do the headstand. That will be tougher. But i'm sure i can do it with practice.

My HOD bought me a cosmetic bag from KL. I"m so glad to have a HOD like him, very thoughtful yet a perfectionist. I'm sure i'll become a very capable teacher if i work with him. Oh yeah, this december, i'll be going to KBFSC, finally the chance for me is here! I look forward to the trip because i have been wanting to go since ages ago. But i'm also dreaded for it because the tentative dates are among the days when i'll be having my period. Some more, the electricity will be off after 11pm. I'm so going to make sure i fall asleep before 11. Well, this always happens, i always worry about the hygience, the darkness and the hard time i'm going to experience before a field trip. In the end, it usually turns out i enjoy myself. So, we'll see..

These days i'm looking forward to vacation. Now that i have a stable monthly income, budget is no longer a problem for me. It's the time that is a challenge. No matter what, i must go out from brunei for once, even if it's just Labuan or Miri. I reckon as long as i get to stay in a hotel, i'll be able to tell myself i have had a vacation. I would love to go to Singapore, miss the food and shopping centres there.
I heard that i'll be sent to BARC for attachment this december though. Hm.. everything needs planning, and i mean, early planning.

Till here for today. Take care old ladies.
Lizzy, enjoy yourself at the emergency unit and good luck for your residency.
Mimi, take your time to adapt to your new life. Good luck with all your practicals. I'll email you about the things Lini asked soon.
Mama, the pay is out right?? We should meet and hang out! I'll contact you about that.

i'm in love...with myself

I am so fond of myself now, for the fact that i am able to be so lenient to myself.

I gave a short test to my students and unfortunately, majority failed. To my surprise, i consider those getting 40% not too bad. I was bit worried because i was afraid i'm the reason why the students don't do well. Maybe something's wronged with my teaching. So, i went up to my colleague in the same department, showed her my notes and the test paper and asked for her opinion. I can't believe at that time, i could be that open-minded that i was willing to accept any criticism. I mean, i thought i would feel insecure to show other people the notes i am making, i thought i couldn't handle negative remarks. Glad that i was wronged. I must say, there are helpful people everywhere but to find them, i must not be embarassed to ask, must be brave enough to admit my weaknesses.
Ok, my colleagues think i am doing ok. So i guess what i need to do now is try to be in my students' shoes, which is the hardest part for me. Not to say i'm arrogant, i am never the weak student in class so it's difficult for me to understand why is it so hard to learn.
Nevermind, i would find the way out one day. I am still new in teaching.

I am also amazed that i can accept the fact that my arms are flabby, my tummy are bulging out. I feel plump but ok with it. As long as i'm consistent with my yoga practice and eat wisely, one day i'll have nice figure.. hm.. well i'm more concerned about reaching a heathy weight now.

For these two things, i am happy with myself. Really made my day. That's why i want to jot it down here :)

Gambate Jocy, you can do it!

I've caught a cold

I must remember to take medicine before i sleep tonight. My nose is getting blocked and my throat feels irritated all the time. Oh gosh.. thank god it's revision week so i don't have to teach. Until now, i still have to deliberately raise my voice whenever i teach. Or else the students at the back won't be able to hear me.
When i was young, i was always told to lower my voice. But now i have to raise my voice more. Hmm...
Similarly, i was brought up in a way that we shouldn't talk back to elders, be it right or wrong. We must obey parents and teachers. Then when i went to uni, we're encouraged to question about everything. It's so contradicting. But i must say, i'm living in a family where conflicts are to be avoided, by all means.

I really enjoyed my yoga class today. I did it at a pace which i was very comfortable with, and because there were only a few people, so my yoga instructor managed to focus on each of us. I got corrected a few times today, which is soo good. I would like to try the shoulder stand and even the head stand soon. Too bad i'm having my period so couldn't do those today.
Then, Amani is coming to the same yoga instructor now. I love watching my yoga instructor and amani doing yoga. They're both very inspiring people to me.

Recently, i have this thought of going out alone, shopping, eating and watching movie all by myself. Maybe these days i seldom have time to be alone. I don't like feeling lonely but i'm the type of people who prefers to be alone once in a while. So i can calm all the noises in my head.

I want to go on a vacation before this year ends. By vacation, i mean staying in a hotel. I rarely have chance to stay in a hotel. It's good so i can save up on accomodation. It's not so good because it's hard for me to really relax during my vacation. I want a vacation where i can forget about the time and day and just let myself go.

My parents will be going to singapore this weekend. I wish to go singapore also, miss the food there. Pun sia sia...
I always have this idea of travelling alone but i don't dare to sleep in a hotel by myself. Heard too many stories about hotel.

Hi Hi, still alive

I just found out that the last time i updated here was more than a month ago. Time really waits for no man.

There are lots of things i always wanted to post it up here because i am going through a lot of my first-times.
Tomorrow morning, i'll have to sing a hari raya song on stage, together with all the other new teachers of the school. Not much practice has been done. But i'm not very worried, i guess thanks to the class-teaching. I'm now more confident with talking in front of a small crowd. Mind the word 'small'. More confident with my english speaking.

Last sunday i had a fantastic afternoon, out with mama and nonoi. We were planning to visit houses but out of the blue, someone mentioned about movie and that's it, we ended up watching 'the perfect gateaway' and enjoyed a 'free' tea time at au lait (thanks to nonoi's cousin). It was such a great sunday, out with the girls. I can't wait for the next time. There are 5 restaurants that we want to try out.

I make a deal with myself that, the next time when i get compliments on how i look, especially my weight, i will just smile and say 'thank you', instead of trying to convince people how wrong they are. I should learn from now to get used to compliments.

I realized that it gets on my nerve everytime when people say that i have a well-pay job in such a way that is just like saying 'you're so lucky!'. Excuse me, i worked hard to get what i have today. It's the same like when people think i get good results because i am smart. Well, maybe i am but that is not what helped me through my exams. Ok, in a way, does it show that i care a lot about what people think of me? I think i'm still thinking like a kid at times, when i need people to pat on my head and tell me i did well.
So now, i'm trying to develop a new habit. Everytime when i'm impressed with something someone does, i make sure i let that person know.

You know, sometimes i get so sick of the way some people do things. But i can never bring myself to tell them what's wrong with them because first, who am i to judge, and secondly, i have been brought up in a way that any conflicts are to be avoided. Sometimes it can be so easy for people to walk over me. All they need to do is to be louder than me. I usually take a long while to get habituated to uncomfortable situations. Wow, not bad! I manage to link what i teach to my life. For your information, for one of the subjects i teach, i am learning and teaching at the same time.

Yesterday i attended my first technical school convocation, as a teacher. It looked as if half of the new teachers in technical studies are graduates from UBD. So many familiar faces there.

I actually got a big assignment paper to set but today i just allowed myself to be laid back for whole morning and evening (afternoon was at the school practising for the song). Finally i got to watch Ice Age 3 and finish watching Sex and the City season 3.

Despite the fact that facebook is the in things nowadays, i am still very conservative. I hardly post my picture on the web and i really don't like it when people post a video with me in it on a site like facebook, WITHOUT asking for my permission. I love sharing stuffs with friends but not on facebook or other similar sites. Because things being posted on facebook means you're sharing it with everyone. If one day, people start relying totally on facebook to keep in touch, i'll be soooo out of touch with people. Is facebook bringing us closer to or tearing us apart from each other?

I am so not used to mentioning my relationship when talking with people. But i realized how much helpful it can be sometimes to let people know i'm not singled anymore. And i also found out one thing. Until today, at the age of 24, i will still panic when someone came up to me and tell me he likes me. I would go speechless and as high as 99% possibility, i would want to run away from that person. Oh gosh, i haven't changed much.. hmm...