:s

adults are complicated...they always make me feel...perplexing...
2 uncles were talking to me at the same time..one advised me not to get marry early...the other one told me to get marry early...
another person said i'm an adult now..so i can judge it myself...if tht's the case..i'd like to tell her what she's been doing is not right..

last night was a nightmare...i came home from a wedding to face a storm at home...i've got over it now..but i won't forget the way they made me felt...and the lesson i learnt...
adults...they can be sooo irresponsible and so blind at times...i hope i won't do the same thing to my kids next time...if i have any...i won't want my kids to experience the same thing like me...

today is the official first day of this term mid-semester break...and now..i feel as if it's my last day of holiday...i've got lots of work to complete this week...
this semester, i spend more time than usual with tek ying...but one of the best things about having the same partner all the time is...we can meet up easily...since we have almost the same schedule...and we know each other well enough to work together...

you know what lizzy...yesterday when i first found out you've forgotten about mama's house function...i felt angry immediately...because i had been waiting for you...woke up forcefully just to make sure you wouldn;t have to wait for me...even had lots of things in mind to tell you oh...
but after i replied you..i felt a bit guilty for sounding harsh...and the anger just left me a few minutes later...after i reminded myself how tight your schedule is and how many things you have to do....but it were another person..i'd have angry for longer time...
just don't have the habit to be mad with my bunch of friends since secondary school for long...pointless maybe to be mad...

i feel so fat now...because i'm chubbier now..OH MY GOD!
have to limit my food intake..since i feel tired to find a time to exercise...i don't want to become anymore fatter...gambate!

*hugs*

i wish to offer hugs...anyone interested in this offer?? :p
haih...i wish to cry lah..but not for me...i feel like i'm a lousy friend..who doesn;t even know what can i do to help...or maybe i'm just too busy with myself....but busy is more like en excuse isnt it?
*hugs* to you...

i wish i could cherish everything and everyone in my life...those i like lah...but everytime, it's just sooo easy to forget to take a look around you and appreciate what you have...
these days...most of us are overwhelmed by our own study, own relationship problems....
some people are happy..some are sad...some are just passing the day....
i wish i could have one day..when i wake up, i don't have any deadlines, no worries, no work...and i can spend the day hanging around...spending time with each of the VIPs in my life..
life is soo contradicting...or maybe i'm the one, not life....some people say spare yourself some time for people around you...while some encourage you to work hard in uni and the rest of the things can just wait....the main point is, i guess, to find a balance between work and rest....don't over-work..and don't rest too much...for me, finding a balance between 2 things are always tough...i'm just bad at it...

for me..the best way to mke yourself happy, is to be content with what you already have....
with the kind of world we live in today, to be able to stay alive is already a gift...being healthy and normal is already a great fortune....

haih..i still wish to hug you....

hm..

i can't remember when was the time that i didn't update for a long time...
this sem...seems like everyone is busy...
i don't have lots of courses..but the behavioural bio practical require more time than normal courses...
too many things had happened..and makes me don't know where to start..

ok..the happy things:
- i've got over the presentation and test
- only prac reports to do before the mid-semester break
- i finally dare to hold the mouse's pups
- got lovely gift on Valentine's Day
- i found out today what i need to do about myself..wish i could do it ;)

actually, quite a lot more...but hm...it's always easier to remember the bad things than the good things..
as for the bad things...hm...let whatever past be past...
tomorrow is another brand new day~

i have a bunch of friends who make me can't stop loving them...they always do the right thing, say the right words...hehe...lizzy, mimi, mama, anna, masniah and so many more..but those 4 are the one i met today...so their names come to my mind automatically..i used to hear people saying things like the friendships you get during school time are always the longest lasting one...i really appreciate them...none of us are very similar...as far as i can think of...the only thing that everyone has in common would be our love for food...we can eat like people who have been starved for days....whenever we go buffet...no matter how much we pay for it..we're never the one rugi...hehe...we might share the same idea but we conclude a thing based on different reasons and opinion....i wish i could have them by my side till i'm old...so i'll never have to worry about being alone...

bee and chiou used to call me laggard before...it's quite true sometimes...i only feel happy after a while..instead of immediately....
only yesterday i began to like playing Minesweeper...because now i know how to avoid all the mines....and it was taught by yil almost 2 years ago...well..i'm never a game person..

my brother has quited school...regardless how hard we tried to persuade him...actually i didn't try hard though...because he's still at his rebellious age...and he's stubborn..just like most of us in this house...i know if i say further more, he's going to throw tantrums...but i must make sure i have a talk with him one of these days..for me, he might not achieve well in his study, he's the cleverest of us all...and i notice most clever people are either lazy or have no interest in study at all...but study in this part of the world has been quite biased i think..they emphasize too much on academy..i think that's too restricted for people who learn things quick...but i think the system in brunei here is improving...at least they started to stress on ECA...
but sometimes, it's true that the more a person study, the wiser he is...of course this doesnt apply to everyone...

i've been too harsh on myself this semester...so i'm now learning to relax...before i lost my interest in my study...

nothing much to talk...or there are too much to mention...:)

midnight post

very late now...but i just have this itch to update my blog...been thinking about it since few days ago...somehow..i just delayed it till now..
just now had a nice time with my friends at my place...but..i can't really enjoy..because it's at my place...so i have to divert my concentration to other things..i always know i'm not a good host...guess it's kind of rude that i invited somebody but don't talk much with them...i'm refering to bee and nining...chiou didn't turn up...i was looking forward to see her...meimei didn't come too..i thought she's coming at first..
then i also went to li mei's open house..didn't go to my godmom's one though..too full and lazy to go...plus..people there will be gambling and drinking there...not the kind of things i like to do..
i feel bit guilty for not inviting other people..i thought for a long time for the inviting list...i don't like to be a host...but this year..my dad didn't prepare red packets...my mom has been paying all the things includin the deco and food...since ping initiated the idea of inviting his friends to come over...i thought i might as well do the same...i'm just...too proud i guess...i feel embarassed if my friends come to my place but i can't give them red packets...so i served them food...since me and ping are sharing the ordering...i tried to limit the number of people i invited...still in the end..when his friends came, there's not much food left...not my fault..he's the one who said he only invited a few friends...and his 'a few' became 10 plus in the end..
i don't know why i'm explaining all this...maybe i've been asked by too many people about why i didn't invite who and who...each time people asked me..i felt i'm so bad...i know i should've invited more people...but...i don't want my mom to spend too much on this...and i don't have much money to help her...maybe i'm just explaining it to make myself feel better..reminding myself why i made a funny inviting list at first place...got a feeling quite a lot of them were surprise or puzzled when i said i don't invite who and who..
is it like...i don't have a big foot yet i'm trying to wear a big shoe?
open house...necessary meaning inviting everyone kah? if so..i wouldn't call it an open house lor..
i still find it embarassing for not giving angpao when people visit you during chinese new year..and i feel pissed off wih my dad...for not buying anything at all for this chinese new year...not even give us the money for angpao...