1st post of 24th

i feel old..
back in high school, i never experience any severe PMS. The most, period only brought me a little bit discomfort mainly because of the hot weather here. But these days, on the eve of my period, i always feel lethargic. And this month, i'm having bad menstrual cramps. I have heard of people have something much worse than what i'm experiencing now, so maybe i shouldn't complain much.
I can only sigh.. old age..

on the bright side, i feel hm... loved. Yes, i feel as if my life is full of love. Love from dear, love from my family, love from old ladies, love from friends. Ah! Also love from myself. I'm really thankful for all the helps i receive from people around me. I'm not showing off. I'm just.. having a feeling that things are too good to be true.

On monday night, i went out with tek ying, lim, sal, rye and nyrol. We had dinner at escapade and lim and nyrol bought a surprise birthday cake for me, tek ying and rye (all the three of us have the same birth month, by 5 days gap). That is my first ever surprise birthday cake, first ever celebration in a restaurant where the waiters sing the birthday song for me. Oh~ i sound like the frog at the bottom of the well. A very special memory from that night.

This afternoon, i went out lunch with nining. It's nice to have some catch-ups. Turned out that we both bought a 2nd-hand car at around the same time. Mine is Colt and hers is Echo. But mine is much cheaper than hers by 6ks. Hope she can handle the monthly payment.

A lot of people (elders) are telling me i should grab the golden chance as a bruneian, should do master now, should study while i'm still young. Too many that i start to wonder, how do they define the term 'good' in this case? I mean, how do they know what is good for me? I know i sound ungrateful but i am really curious about that.
I might be short-sighted in a sense that currently, i don't see the point of earning $3k a month since a 26 salary is sufficient for me. And i don't see the point of furthering my study when i don't have the desire for it.
Am i being silly here? Whatever, i'm just going with my own plan. I'm still skeptical about the correlation between qualification and ability to earn big money. Sometimes i think the fact that i am well-educated is hindering me from achieving what i want for life, because i'm too analytical, too worried about possible risks. People always say you have to grab the chance or time waits for no man. So by the time i make my decision, the opportunity is most of the time gone or taken by someone else.
For example, i've been thinking about teaching at tuition school for years but i never take action. Because i'm always worrying that what if i can't teach? what if the students don't improve? will that waste their parents' money? what if the students don't get good grades? I see teaching tuition as a very great responsibility (I wonder had i been that demanding on my tuition teachers back in secondary schools??) Anyway, i'm determined to give teaching a go. After all, the word 'teacher' had filled the blank for my ambition since i was still very young, until i reached form 6, when i realized i have more than 1 choice.