I'm still surviving

It's been a long~ time since i last updated. Not only that, i also haven't got the time to read old ladies' blogs. So sorry!
If you ask, am i that busy? Well, can't say i don't have the time to read blogs and write. Just that, when i have something to post, i don't have the computer with me. But when i have lappie with me, i'm not longer in the mood to post.

A lot of things have happened recently.
First, i was busy helping my colleague to train the students for Nasyid competition. Not that i know, but i can give some suggestions on their gestures, voice projection and so on. Also brought snacks and drinks for my students. And, they've got the first place among the other groups of students in my school.

THen the school holiday started, so was my vacation. Yup Yup! I have just come back from Taiwan. Erm.. i didn't really enjoy the trip because it wasn't as i wanted it to be. Too rushed, went to too many places till i didn't have the time to 'register' to my brain that 'I have been there'. I really don't call that as vacation. My ideal vacation will be, i sit down on a place and take my time to observe the people and things around me. Like what i did in Melbourne on my last evening there. It brings a sense of relaxation to me whenever i'm so free yet others are soo busy. I guess i need that contradiction to prove to me that i am on vacation.
So overall, i'm not very impressed with my taiwan trip, though i did go to quite a lot of tourist sites and ate like crazy there. Good news is, i didn't put on any weights. Should thank to all the walkings. Imagine out since 6am or 7 am and walked throughout the day until returned to where i stayed at 9pm or 10 pm.
I also drank lots of tea there, those that claim can wash off the oil and fats from food. The outcome? I got severe menstrual cramp last night *sniff* sniff*
I would say, Taiwan is a great place to visit. NIce scenery, nice people and nice price of food. But i won't want to live in Taipei, there are too many people there. I get stress-out easily when in a crowded and noisy place.

Ok, now is the sad news.
One of our students drowned in the water reservoir of the fisheries dept of the school. That incident happened on sunday (day before yesterday) and yesterday, the 1st day of school reopen, the whole school was clouded with mourning. I don't teach him but i know him. He'd always say 'Hello teacher' whenever we passed by each other. It was soooo hard to accept the fact that he's no longer around. I also feel sorry for the 3 students who witnessed the drowning. It must be a nightmare for them and i'm sure they're going to live with this memory for a long long time. One of them happened to be my student. I hope they can stop blaming themselves. It's an accident. The drowned student himself insisted to swim there at the water reservoir after so many people told him not to. I believe everything happens for a reason. There must be a good reason that God has decided to claim his life now. And i also believe that he had lived his life to the fullest for the short 17 years. So many people in the school like him.

Ok, enough of that. That has been the main conversation in school since yesterday. I feel very sad that he's gone and i can't imagine how he had felt when he was stucked under the water. I hope he is in heaven now and no more sufferings for him.

Another thing that troubles me lately is, i'm so fed-up with the office politics. I don't know who are friends, who are enemies. This person told me not to tell so much to that person, but turned out these days the 2 of them always go out for lunch together. What i hate the most is, they told me things and then asked me to keep it from someone. Do i look that trustworthy?
I don't feel flattered if the answer is yes. I prefer not to know anything because i feel guilty for not sharing the information, since it's related to work. Why can't they make things transparent? Or at least translucent? Why must each of them keep things in the dark? If it's related to the work, aren't we supposed to talk it out, instead of complaining at the back?
People asked, don't i have second thought about my job? I know some young instructors are thinking to quit. But for me, it will be the same, as long as you're working with the public sectors. So i never thought of leaving my school. I can't bear to leave my students behind. They're my first group of students and i'm also their first year teacher. I always feel that i have the responsibility to look after them until they have graduated.
I like teaching but too bad i can't just focus on teaching. Next sem, a lot of the teachers are leaving for their further study. I'll be the only instructor left for my department and i want to see the maximum numbers of hours i can handle per week. Challenging right?
So, no, i never thought of leaving my school. but i do think of leaving my country. If this is going to be how the system works, either i adapt myself to the system and become like the others, or i leave and find another place where i can learn and achieve more.

Oh yeah, Lizzy, thanks for the greeting. Haih.. i'm, as dear put it, a quarter of century old now. Can't believe i'm getting wiser so soon hahaha
I like the cockroach cakes. So cute~ Did you really try it?