Exam's eve

last time i used to complain to lizzy that we never fight or quarrel....unlike other bestfriends who quarrel and then compromise and those stuffs...
now i believe it's because when we are upsetted by the other one, we tend to keep it to ourselves..
Sorry lizzy....for hurting your feeling...bit useless now to apologize though..what done is done...
a lot of things pop up in my mind while reading your blog...
you learnt not to let what others think bother you..me too...but...the result is...you become the you now and i become the me now...
honestly, i feel like i'm growing up....i accept that nothing is perfect..i stop trying to be nice to everyone...start to draw a line between a lot of things...i realized what i really want and go for it...and i start to know what can be done and what can't be done...maybe sometimes people find me bored, i follow as strictly to the rules as i can...i don't longer enjoy being under a limelight...i think i've become someone very serious about life...i'm fed-up with the role of a spectator or catalyst...i want to be a reactant...
i know some people think i'm in charge of my own life...everything's following my plan...but in fact, a lot of the times, i'm lost, i feel isolated..one good thing is...i voice out my doubts or opinions more often now, with my family..and with few people i know well...but i'm keeping more things to myself...i avoid things or people i don't feel comfortable with...hmm..

my god! supposed to be concentrating on exam....hehe...
need a break from whole day revision...i took quite a lot of breaks already though...
i revised in a new way...i don't try to be ambitious and remember everything...which i now believe is impossible for me...just revise selectively...hehe even my way of studying changed...

lizzy...it's not silly to decide based on your parents; opinions....in fact, that's something i've been wished to do...my parents never plan my future for me...they stopped interfering with my study eversince i passed my PCE...and slowly, they begin to think that i can survive on my own...
i still remember when i was still in a dilemma about switching from biomed to bio sci...i wished so much my parents could give me an opinion...hm..maybe that's why i'm independent and behave like a big sister even when i'm the 2nd child..

i think it's a special experience...when you look back..you realized how many silly things you've done...and then feel like you've taken a big step forward in your life...