i know it's impossible to ask you people not to care about whatever i typed here...and i feel very sweet whenever i see your comments...they always remind me that im not alone...thanks people...love you guys..
just now..i chatted with him...i asked a question...which i thought his answer will make me feel comforted...but i was wrong...his answer hurt me...but it;s a good one...although i feel angry with him...i don't blame him..i'm the ridiculous one....and thanks to him..i feel like..awaken up from a sleep or dream...
now i'm very determined...as determined as i was on the night of my 17th birthday..the night i completely give up on esmond....
his words hurt me....because the words indirectly showed that this is the end...
but also because of that...i know it's really the time i should move on...i won't daydream anymore..
of course i'm a bit sad...but compare to sadness...there's more relieve....
maybe he doesn't need me anymore....maybe i just miss the time when i have a bf...
no matter what...the fact now is we're just friends...maybe we can still be close friends..but definitely not now...not yet....we both need time to recover...
one week of feeling sad and listless...enough for me...my life has other things which i'm sure are better than drowning myself with sadness..
i'm confident that from now on..i'll really move on..maybe i'll still be sad at times...maybe will still cry...but..that's just part of healing....also part of growing up...really eh..i feel like i've grown up a bit today...hehe...
i really hope he can move on without much difficulties too...
3 comments:
it's not them...it's me...i only remember the trip at midnight..and had just confirmed with anna just before i sms you..really sorry...really oh..nothing to do with mimi and anna...i just..not in the right mood...so a bit lagging...
we'll never forget about you one lah...when i first told mimi i might be going..i thought of asking you along too..but after the class, lunch time and english class...i forgot to ask you...
before i sms you..i was thinking maybe you'll feel like last minute..but i thought it's still better to let you know than keeping it from you...
really sorry
joce ah.. i think best thing now is to put ur effort onto ur studies 1st lo.. r u doing it well? isnt it like 3 weeks b4 ur exact date of xm.. later after tat i'll come back to talk to u more.. coz i tot u may need to know some things.. okay just conc on ur work now.. and i know now u're doing it well la.. sigh being lame again.. :p
u know somehow some thing seems to really bother me in the sense, i feel so discontent looking at some thing.. i.e. someone who's like drowned.. too drowned with ... wat else.. i mean.. well nothing to say la.. hey u always haf my support ah.. tk~ u know how sweet ur frens are wahah~! :D
oh yea jocy.. i was wondering if ur blog is still private.. wonder if i can include a link to ur site.. maybe more ppl can help tgh u're just expressing.. but i respect ur decision oh..
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